DASHA OKONJI
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Everything is important! What are my priorities?

16/7/2020

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Priority is something that you think is more important than other things and should be dealt with first (according to the Oxford Dictionary). I would add that priorities are also a very helpful guide (and should be the only guide!) to decide what to take on and what to schedule in when.
So how do you decide what your priorities are when there’s a multitude of important areas?
I think the best way to identify priorities is to reflect on your life vision and your current season in life. 
  • What are your needs? 
  • What are your aspirations? 
  • What will make you happy?
  • What would you like to have more time for? 
  • What would you like to invest your time and energy into?
  • What would give you energy? 
  • What motivates you? 
These are just some of the questions that help in exploring your priorities. 
You can also look at your Wheel of Life (I went into some detail about what it is and how I use it on my Facebook page Dec 2019-Jan 2020). I like to use these areas with my clients:
  1. Physical health
  2. Emotional health
  3. Spiritual health 
  4. Personal growth 
  5. Career 
  6. Finances 
  7. Significant other
  8. Family and friends 
  9. Fun 
  10. Community / Contribution 
Select the top few areas that are important to you. I always suggest to my clients to select a time horizon for which they want to set priorities. It has to be very realistic though. Personally, I like to have annual priorities, and review them every quarter.
Another tip in setting priorities is to be quite specific. For example, if you say “My family is my priority”, I would challenge you to get more specific:
  • In what way is it a priority?
  • Is it about spending more time on weekends together instead of taking work home? 
  • Is it about refocusing your spending and making sure you save for your kids education?
This can be tricky to do on your own. Find someone to be a sounding board, ideally the person you’d like to have priorities aligned with. Be careful though - make sure the priorities you set are truly your priorities: 
  • not what they should be (“I should really improve my fitness” but you’re busy taking care of your family)
  • not what someone suggests (“It would be great if we could reduce our spending” [says your partner] but you really need to invest in your personal development or your business)
  • not what your fears tell you (“If you take this new role, you will lose flexibility”, but you’re really ready for a change)
  • not what your inner critic commands (“Let’s finally focus on that weight issue”, but you are already eating well and exercising)
  • not what your unrealistic dreamer throws in (“Volunteer at a local charity” but you already have 24 hours of each day busy with activities and appointments that move you forward). 
Be real and be realistic about it. And then align all your actions to your priorities by making choices and schedules that are dictated by what’s truly important and energy giving to you. 
If you’d like to work with someone independent first to get clarity on your own priorities, I’d be happy to offer a couple of 60 min long sessions to support you. Just get in touch! 
Remember - “Action expresses priorities” (Mahatma Gandhi).
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